Citizendia

Hillary Rodham Clinton on the cover of the Weekly World News.
Hillary Rodham Clinton on the cover of the Weekly World News. Hillary Diane Rodham Clinton (born October 26 1947 is the junior United States Senator from
Garden of Eden
Garden of Eden

The Weekly World News (WWN) was a tabloid newspaper published by American Media Inc. Not to be confused with Eden Gardens.The Garden of Eden ( Hebrew "pleasure" גַּן עֵדֶן Arabic: جنات عدن, A tabloid is a Newspaper industry term which refers to a smaller newspaper format per spread to a weekly or semi-weekly alternative newspaper that focuses on local-interest American Media Inc, is a publisher of a number of major United States -based magazines and Supermarket tabloids Company background American Media's Its last editor-in-chief was Jeff Rovin. Jeff Rovin is an Author of many How to Play video game books which were popular in the 1980s and 1990s It combined wire reports of strange news with in-house writings and columns, many of which were outside of the traditional journalistic fact-checking process. There was also a short lived TV version on the USA Network in the style of network news shows. Television ( TV) is a widely used Telecommunication medium for sending ( Broadcasting) and receiving moving Images, either monochromatic USA Network (commonly referred to as USA) is an American Cable television channel with about 89 million household subscribers as of 2005 A television network is a distribution network for Television content whereby a central operation provides programming for many Television stations News is any new information or information on Current events which is presented by print, broadcast, Internet, or Word of mouth On 25 October 2005, the company released a compilation anthology called Batboy Lives! by David Perel and the Editors. Events 1147 - The Portuguese, under Afonso I, and Crusaders from England and Flanders conquer Lisbon after a Year 2005 ( MMV) was a Common year starting on Saturday (link displays full calendar of the Gregorian calendar.

On July 21, 2007, parent company American Media announced that it would suspend publication of both the print and website version of Weekly World News, with the last issue being printed on August 3, after two weeks of 'reprint' issues (no new content). Events 356 BC - Herostratus sets fire to the Temple of Artemis in Ephesus, one of the Seven Wonders of the World Year 2007 ( MMVII) was a Common year starting on Monday of the Gregorian calendar in the 21st century. American Media Inc, is a publisher of a number of major United States -based magazines and Supermarket tabloids Company background American Media's Events 8 - Roman Empire General Tiberius defeats Dalmatians on the river Bathinus. [1] Subsequent announcements instead gave August 27 as the last issue, and state that the online version will continue. Events 479 BC - Greco-Persian Wars: Persian forces led by Mardonius are routed by Pausanias, the Spartan [2] No reason was given for the decision; an editor with the paper said that "the reasons given don't make sense. "[3]

The paper advised potential buyers that its final issue would be worth considerably more on eBay than the newsstand price. eBay Inc is an American Internet company that manages eBaycom an Online auction and shopping Website in which people and businesses buy and In fact, on the cover of the final issue, readers were encouraged to buy several copies to sell on eBay.

The Weekly World News is currently being published as a small insert within Sun magazine, with new material being printed alongside articles and columns from older issues. Sun is a Supermarket tabloid owned by American Media Inc. Its contents have often come under question

Contents

History

The WWN was launched in 1979[1] by publisher Generoso Pope as a means to continue using the black and white press that the higher-profile tabloid, The National Enquirer, had been printed on, when the sister publication switched to color printing. Year 1979 ( MCMLXXIX) was a Common year starting on Monday (link displays the 1979 Gregorian calendar) The National Enquirer (also commonly known as the Enquirer) is an American supermarket tabloid now published by American [4] Like many supermarket weeklies in the U.S., the Weekly World News was published in Boca Raton, Florida. The United States of America —commonly referred to as the Boca Raton ("bōkə rə-tōn" is a city in Palm Beach County, Florida incorporated in May 1925 It was unique as a tabloid because it was printed entirely in black and white.

Its longtime editor, Eddie Clontz, a 10th-grade dropout from North Carolina and former copy editor at small newspapers [4], joined the paper in 1981. In 1999, David Pecker bought American Media Inc. , which owned the Weekly World News. Within the next two years, a lot of WWN's longtime writers and editors, including Clontz, Sal Ivone, Joe Berger, Bob Lind, Dick Kulpa and Leskie Pinson, were gone, replaced by young comedy writers. Bob Lind (born Robert Neale Lind in Baltimore Ohio, November 25, 1942) is a Folk music Singer/songwriter who reached the height [4] Clontz left the paper in 2001, having been there 20 years, and died in 2004. [5]

In the 1980s, the circulation of WWN peaked at 1. 2 million per issue. In a filing with the United States Securities and Exchange Commission in March 2007, American Media said that sales of WWN in 2006 were only 83,000 per issue. The US Securities and Exchange Commission (commonly known as the SEC) is an independent agency of the United States government which holds primary responsibility [6]

General approach to stories

The WWN traditionally claimed that it always printed the truth (typical slogan: "Nothing but the truth: The Weekly World News!"). Many stories, however, appeared to have comedic intent. Confirming this, in Batboy Lives! a semi-serious introduction admitted that while Reader A reads the tabloid for real news, Reader B will read it for laughs. While the tabloid's main rival, Sun, carried a fine print disclaimer, the WWN never publicly questioned the accuracy of its own stories until 2004, when the paper began stating that "the reader should suspend disbelief for the sake of enjoyment". Sun is a Supermarket tabloid owned by American Media Inc. Its contents have often come under question A disclaimer is generally any statement intended to specify or delimit the scope of rights and obligations that may be exercised and enforced by parties in a legally-recognized relationship In recent years, Sun moved more toward articles on health, and miracle cures, mostly leaving WWN alone in its unique niche of basing a weekly publication almost entirely on "news" that the traditional media dared not report, such as sightings of Elvis Presley and the Loch Ness monster.

On occasion, it ran strange-but-true stories, such as "DEVOUT CHRISTIAN ATTACKED -- AND HE'S THE ONE FINED!"[7] referring to conservative English street preacher Harry Hammond being fined after he was threatened by "homosexual liberals. Strange but true (or Strange but true) is a Tabloid Newspaper column (such as the Weekly World News) that Harry Hammond ( ca 1932 - 2002 was a British street evangelist who became the subject of a UK-wide public debate after his preaching led to his arrest for a public " Other verifiable stories included, but were not limited to, those of a giant mutant hog monster attacking Georgia. Hogzilla is the name given to a wild hog hybrid that was shot and killed in Alapaha Georgia, United States, on June 17, 2004 [8] It reported on the discovery of an infant dragon preserved in formaldehyde proving the existence of dragons. In December 2003, David Hart claimed to have found a pickled dragon or more precisely what appeared to be the Fetus of a winged reptile-type creature preserved in [9]. It also quoted Vatican exorcist Father Gabriele Amorth on Pope John Paul II's battles with Satan. Vatican City, officially the State of the Vatican City (Stato della Città del Vaticano is a Landlocked sovereign City-state whose territory Fr Gabriele Amorth (born May 1, 1925) is an Italian Roman Catholic Priest and the senior Exorcist of the Diocese Pope Pope Satan, ( Standard Hebrew Satan'el, English accuser) is a term that originates from the Abrahamic faiths, being traditionally [10]

The second of three possible future covers of the Weekly World News
The second of three possible future covers of the Weekly World News

However, these stories were the exceptions. When most of the supermarket tabloids were acquired by Fleet Street publishers, they switched to celebrity gossip, but the Weekly World News remained devoted to weirdness. A tabloid is a Newspaper industry term which refers to a smaller newspaper format per spread to a weekly or semi-weekly alternative newspaper that focuses on local-interest Fleet Street is a street in London, England named after the River Fleet. A celebrity is a widely-recognized or famous person who commands a high degree of public and media attention In the introduction to Batboy Lives! Sal Ivone, former managing editor, said, "If someone calls me up and says their toaster is talking to them, I don't refer them to professional help, I say, 'Put the toaster on the phone'. " Derrik Lang, a former stringer for the paper, said, "That fat guy with the sunburned belly and that kid abused by his own shadow were living, breathing people with wilder-than-wild stories to tell — in my head. I can't attest to the entire publication, but everything in my stories was fake — you know, depending on how you define fake. "[11]

WWN was a journalistic leader in following the progress of Bat Boy, the half-bat, half-boy superhero; and P'lod, an extraterrestrial who became involved in Earth politics and had an affair with Hillary Clinton. Fictional Biography According to Weekly World News Bat Boy has a chaotic sense of Morality. P'lod is according to the American Supermarket tabloid the Weekly World News, an extraterrestrial who actively seeks to advise U See also List of extraterrestrials in fiction In Popular cultures Life forms -especially intelligent life forms that are of extraterrestrial Hillary Diane Rodham Clinton (born October 26 1947 is the junior United States Senator from Other important issues regularly reported on included the oncoming great depression/apocalypse, and newly found lost prophecies.

WWN was also in the forefront of informing the public about alien abductions, the Loch Ness Monster, Bigfoot, and time travel. Alien Discussions Proceedings of the Abduction Study Conference. The Loch Ness Monster ( Nessiteras rhombopteryx) is an alleged animal family and upward Incertae sedis, purportedly inhabiting Scotland 's Loch Ness Bigfoot or Sasquatch is alleged to be an Ape -like creature inhabiting remote forests mainly in the Pacific Northwest region of the United States and Canada This article details time travel itself For other uses see Time Traveler. WWN once carried a story about inhabitants of the planet Mercury who had proposed to establish a colony in San Francisco — presumably they sought a more temperate climate, where lead was generally a solid. The City and County of San Francisco is the fourth most populous city Characteristics Lead has a dull luster and is a dense, Ductile, very soft highly (In one of the latest, Iraq was revealed to possess a "time tunnel" capable of facilitating time travel. )

Occasionally, stories published in the Weekly World News sent shock waves through the legal and law enforcement communities. For example, in early 1989, WWN published startling photographs on the front page of executed serial killer Ted Bundy on the autopsy table. Year 1989 ( MCMLXXXIX) was a Common year starting on Sunday (link displays 1989 Gregorian calendar) Theodore Robert Bundy (November 24 1946 &ndash January 24 1989 known as Ted Bundy, was an American Serial killer. Electrode burns on Bundy's shaved head with his fixed and dilated pupils staring into space could clearly be seen in the photographs. Angry and surprised officials in Florida vowed to catch the person responsible. Eventually, a low-level employee of the Alachua County, Florida Medical Examiners office was arrested and charged with taking and selling the photographs. Alachua County is a County located in the US state of Florida.

Columns and features

Ed Anger's 1996 book
Ed Anger's 1996 book

Regular columns included Ed Anger (opinion), Hi Dolly (relationship advice), Dear Dottie (outspoken advice columnist), Horse Sense (medical advice), Monkey Business (financial and business-related advice and information) and Madame Malisa (psychic). Ed Anger was a pseudonymous opinion columnist in the Weekly World News, a U The word psychic (ˈsaɪkɨk from the Greek psychikos—"of the soul mental" refers to the claimed ability to perceive things hidden from the normal senses

Beginning on May 9, 2005, the Weekly World News went "All New", along with other tabloid papers, such as the National Enquirer which had become "Bigger•Bolder•Better". Events 1457 BC - Battle of Megiddo (15th century BC between Thutmose III and a large Canaanite coalition under the King of Year 2005 ( MMV) was a Common year starting on Saturday (link displays full calendar of the Gregorian calendar. The National Enquirer (also commonly known as the Enquirer) is an American supermarket tabloid now published by American In the new Weekly World News, Serena and Sonya Sabak's psychic column was replaced by the horoscopes of Madame Malisa and Dotti Primrose's "Dear Dotti" was supplanted by an advice column called "Hi Dolly" written by a middle-aged, blonde woman reared somewhere south of the Mason-Dixon Line. The word psychic (ˈsaɪkɨk from the Greek psychikos—"of the soul mental" refers to the claimed ability to perceive things hidden from the normal senses

The new WWN included a weekly "Weird Picture Search" by famed Mad cartoonist Sergio Aragones. Mad is a monthly American Humor Magazine founded by editor Harvey Kurtzman and publisher William Gaines in 1952 Sergio Aragonés Domenech (born September 6, 1937, San Mateo, Castellón, Spain) is a Cartoonist and writer best known

Other features included Trivia, Test Yourself, Jokes and "Miss Adventure", "The Gayest American Hero", who has penetrated the mob, gone to Hollywood, and fought DRAG-U-LA traveling from the depths of the Earth's center to Outer Space. Miss Adventure, 30 is a Fictional character whose adventures (and misadventures appear in the American Supermarket tabloid the Weekly World The Mafia (also known as Cosa Nostra) is a Sicilian Criminal Secret society which is believed to have first developed in the mid-19th century DRAG-U-LA, along with The Munster Koach, was one of two cars designed by Tom Daniels while working for George Barris and Barris Kustom Industries for the TV show

Two pages of comic strips became a popular feature, many spun off from feature stories. "SpyCat", created by Dick Siegel, was drawn by Ernie Colon. SpyCat is a comic strip appearing in Weekly World News created by Dick Siegel and drawn by Ernie Colon. SpyCat spoke nine different languages ranging from Persian to "dog" and was armed with "Adamwestium" claws and deadly cat-of-nine-tails. Adamantium is a fictional metallic or crystalline substance which has seen extensive use in comics cartoons and video games He wrote free-form poetry when not waging war on America's enemies -- at home and abroad.

"Matthew Daemon", also created by Dick Siegel, was written and illustrated by Mike Collins and was a spin off from the "SOS Matthew Daemon (Seeker of Obscure Supernaturals)" feature. Mike Collins is a Wales -based Comic book artist and Writer and has been working in comics since the mid-1980s Daemon's lair was located beneath Grant's Tomb. Daemon specialized in B-List Monster hunting.

"Alien Baby" by Craig Boldman chronicles the adventures of Moogera the dead beat alien dad, alien baby Ethan, and Stacy, his Earth-born mother.

"Bat Boy" is written and drawn by Danielle Corsetto and is a new spin on America's favorite hybrid. Fictional Biography According to Weekly World News Bat Boy has a chaotic sense of Morality.

Recurring subjects

Bat Boy

Main article: Bat Boy

Possibly the best known of all the stories to come out of WWN, Bat Boy was first featured in a 1992 issue after being found in a cave. Fictional Biography According to Weekly World News Bat Boy has a chaotic sense of Morality. Fictional Biography According to Weekly World News Bat Boy has a chaotic sense of Morality. He has since led police on a high speed chase, fought in the war on terror, led the troops to capture Saddam Hussein, bitten Santa Claus, and traveled into Outer Space. Saddam Hussein Abd al-Majid al-Tikriti ( Arabic: ar صدام حسين عبد المجيد التكريتي --> April 28 1937 &ndash December 30 Santa Claus, also known as Saint Nicholas, Father Christmas, Kris Kringle, or simply " Santa " is the In 2000, he gave his endorsement to Al Gore. Albert Arnold Gore Jr (born March 31 1948 is an American environmental Activist, author Businessperson, former Politician, and former It was foretold that Bat Boy would become president in 2028. The story of Bat Boy was the basis for an acclaimed off-Broadway musical, Bat Boy: The Musical, though the play ended tragically and ignores the continuity of the original stories. Bat Boy The Musical is an Off-Broadway and West End musical. The Weekly World News story about a half-boy half- Bat In addition to articles, Bat Boy has been featured in a comic strip since 2004, though it's said that only the articles are the "true" story of Bat Boy. A comic strip is a sequence of drawings that tells a story Currently in the Western world, most comic strips are written and drawn by a Comics artist

A Scientist

"A Scientist", is typically shown and quoted. He was known as "A Scientist", to distinguish him from A Baffled Scientist. His findings are as close as WWN gets to having a reliable source.

Page 5 Honey

Each week a different model was featured on page 5 and on the back page. She was usually wearing a bikini and a description of her was printed. A bikini or two-piece is a type of women's Swimsuit, characterized by two separate parts &mdash one covering the Breasts (optionally in the case of This article has been absent from WWN since the Halloween issue of 2006.

See also: Page 3 girl at The Sun. The Sun is a Tabloid daily newspaper published in the United Kingdom and Ireland with the highest circulation of any daily English-language

"ALIVE!", starring (often) Elvis Presley

One of several "Elvis is alive!" covers.
One of several "Elvis is alive!" covers.

One of the other many recurring subjects was the occasional "ALIVE!" cover story. Most often the story pertained to some sort of human or creature, such as a mummy, prehistoric creature and occasionally a human who had been frozen in a block of ice (ex. Santa Claus. Santa Claus, also known as Saint Nicholas, Father Christmas, Kris Kringle, or simply " Santa " is the )

Another subject often tackled by WWN is the reemergence of many prominent figures believed by most to be deceased, including Hank Williams, Marilyn Monroe, John F. Kennedy, and Adolf Hitler. Hank Williams ( September 17, 1923 – January 1, 1953) was an American Singer-songwriter and Musician who has Marilyn Monroe (born Norma Jeane Mortenson, June 1 1926 &ndash August 5 1962 baptized Norma John Fitzgerald "Jack" Kennedy (May 29 1917&ndashNovember 22 1963 often referred to by his initials JFK, was the thirty-fifth President of Hi and welcome to Wikipedia! Please understand that this article is frequently vandalized and vandalism is reverted immediately Among the most frequently printed reports were those asserting that "Elvis is alive. "

The WWN frequently reported Elvis sightings with a series of articles claiming that Elvis Presley had faked his death and had recently emerged from years of seclusion to prepare for a comeback. Obviously altered photos purported to show a gray-haired balding Elvis sneaking into a movie theater and coming out of a Burger King restaurant. Burger King ( often abbreviated to When the US Postal Service conducted a poll to determine the design of the Elvis commemorative postage stamp, the WWN conducted its own poll pitting the USPS' 1950s Elvis and 1970s Elvis versus their own 1990s Elvis. A postage stamp is an adhesive paper evidence of pre-paying a fee for postal services The 1950s Decade refers to the years of 1950 to 1959 inclusive This article is about the Decade 1970-1979 For the Year 1970 see 1970. The 1990s collectively refers to the years between and including 1990 and 1999 The WWN's Elvis won.

In the late 1990s, the newspaper broke the news about the death of a popular rock musician long presumed deceased, running a front cover that said "Elvis Presley Dead!", revealing that he had been living a secret life since 1977, but was now "really dead. " In a 2004 Washington Post article on Clontz's death, humorist Gene Weingarten claimed that he and Dave Barry were the sources of the story. Gene Weingarten (born on October 2 1951 in New York) is a humor writer and Pulitzer Prize David "Dave" Barry (born July 3, 1947) is a bestselling American author and Pulitzer Prize -winning columnist who wrote a nationally [12] According to Weingarten, the WWN later reported that claims of Elvis' death had been a hoax. In an earlier telling of his story, Weingarten varied some details. [13]


The World's Fattest. . .

Numerous stories regarding shockingly obese people and animals made the pages of WWN, the most popular of which being Tonya, the world's fattest cat. After first being discovered, WWN encouraged readers to send in their guesses as to exactly how much they believed Tonya weighed. Weighing in at over 80 lbs, Tonya has been featured being adopted, and possibly sat on by the world's fattest woman. Later stories involved Tonya's attempts to lose weight through the "Catkins" diet, her struggle with anorexia, and claims that she had been eaten by the world's thinnest woman. Other stories have featured the exploits of the world's fattest couple at the gym, the world's fattest baby, and even a similar weight guessing contest featuring the world's fattest dog. One continuing story featured a morbidly obese man named Buster Simcus who had lost so much weight, it left 80 pounds of loose skin hanging off his body that he was planning to have surgically removed. By the next story, he blew up again, severely damaging his scars.

Upcoming economic depressions

WWN June 6, 2005
WWN June 6, 2005

WWN covered stories that featured analysis of a coming Great Depression in the immediate future, in which many prominent celebrities, politicians, and icons of business would become penniless. The cover story of the June 6, 2005 issue warned that the second Great Depression was "just weeks away. Events 1508 - Maximilian I Holy Roman Emperor, is defeated in Friulia by Venetian forces; he is forced to sign a three-year Year 2005 ( MMV) was a Common year starting on Saturday (link displays full calendar of the Gregorian calendar. " Because of this, Texas Oil Tycoons were planning to flee to Luxembourg, the only country to survive this economic crash. Luxembourg (Groussherzogtum Lëtzebuerg Grand-Duché de Luxembourg Großherzogtum Luxemburg is a small Landlocked country in Western Europe, bordered by The consequences of this depression would include:

A follow up in the August 15, 2005 issue reveals plans by China to buy a controlling interest in all of America's banks, effectively buying out the nation's economy. Events 778 - The Battle of Roncevaux Pass, at which Roland is killed Year 2005 ( MMV) was a Common year starting on Saturday (link displays full calendar of the Gregorian calendar. China ( Wade-Giles ( Mandarin) Chung¹kuo² is a cultural region, an ancient Civilization, and depending on perspective a National According to the article, China currently owns more than 100 US banks totaling roughly 17 trillion dollars, making them the majority shareholder in America.

Religion and Biblical relics

Weekly World News was often the first to report the findings of biblical relics, including Noah's Ark, the Garden of Eden (claimed by the tabloid to be in Colorado), and the discovery of additional commandments from God. Noah's Ark, according to the Book of Genesis (chapters 6-9 is the story of a large vessel built at God 's command to save Noah, his family Not to be confused with Eden Gardens.The Garden of Eden ( Hebrew "pleasure" גַּן עֵדֶן Arabic: جنات عدن, The State of Colorado ( or chiefly by nonresidents) is a state located in the Rocky Mountain region of the United States of America. The magazine obtained information when Jesus will return to Earth. Jesus of Nazareth (7–2 BC / BCE —26–36 AD / CE) WWN was also the first to speak of a pair of sandals worn by Jesus. Other stories disclosed that natural disasters such as earthquakes have opened up gates and portals to Hell from which demons have escaped which are now wreaking havoc upon the earth. An earthquake is the result of a sudden release of energy in the Earth 's crust that creates Seismic waves Earthquakes are recorded with a Seismometer Hell, according to many Religious beliefs, is a location in the Afterlife, which may be described as a place of suffering A story shortly after September 11, 2001 showed the face of Satan appearing in a cloud of dust caused by the collapse of the World Trade Center. Satan, ( Standard Hebrew Satan'el, English accuser) is a term that originates from the Abrahamic faiths, being traditionally The collapse of the World Trade Center occurred after the September 11 attacks. Similar stories had appeared before, wherein Satan's face had appeared in a thunderstorm.

Following the terrorist attack on September 11, 2001 WWN featured articles exposing plans for possible future terrorist attacks on the United States of America. Events 9 - The Battle of the Teutoburg Forest ends 506 - The Bishops of Visigothic Gaul Year 2001 ( MMI) was a Common year starting on Monday according to the Gregorian calendar. A 2004 cover story leaked plans by Kim Jong-il to eventually invade and conquer the United States. Kim Jong-il (also written as Kim Jong Il) (born 16 February 1941 Vyatskoye, Soviet Union; official biographies state 16 February 1942 Baekdu Other stories featured profiles on the location and nature of Iraq's Weapons of Mass Destruction, including the news that Saddam Hussein had an arsenal of giant slingshots and Dinosaurs. A weapon of mass destruction ( WMD) is a weapon which can kill large numbers of humans and/or cause great damage to man-made structures (e In 2003, a series of articles profiled the ongoing relationship, and eventual marriage of Saddam Hussein and Osama Bin Laden. Saddam Hussein Abd al-Majid al-Tikriti ( Arabic: ar صدام حسين عبد المجيد التكريتي --> April 28 1937 &ndash December 30 Osama bin Laden, with some spelling variations is the name used in English to refer to (أسامة بن محمد بن عوض بن لادن born 10 March Other stories have made claims that Bin Laden is actually a dwarf, that he recruited a cloned Adolf Hitler to join Al Qaeda or that he is in fact dead and that the CIA is keeping it a secret. DWARF is a widely used standardized Debugging data format. DWARF was originally designed along with ELF, although it is independent of Object file Cloning in Biology is the process of producing populations of genetically-identical individuals that occurs in nature when organisms such as Bacteria, Insects Hi and welcome to Wikipedia! Please understand that this article is frequently vandalized and vandalism is reverted immediately Al-Qaeda, alternatively spelled al-Qaida, al-Qa`ida or al-Qa`idah, ( Arabic:; ar-Latn ''al-qāʿidah'' Translation: The Since being captured by Batboy, Saddam has been humiliated by female prison guards, won the United States lottery, and even demanded that the government pay for his sex change operation. Sex reassignment surgery (SRS gender reassignment surgery, or sex-change operation is a term for the Surgical procedures by which a person's physical

The April 25, 2005 issue of WWN revealed a thwarted attempt by terrorists abducted by aliens to hijack their UFO and fly it into the White House. Events 1607 - Eighty Years' War: The Dutch fleet destroys the anchored Spanish fleet at Gibraltar. Year 2005 ( MMV) was a Common year starting on Saturday (link displays full calendar of the Gregorian calendar. See also List of extraterrestrials in fiction In Popular cultures Life forms -especially intelligent life forms that are of extraterrestrial See also Executive Office of the President of the United States The White House, formerly known as the Executive Mansion, is the Official residence

Saddam Hussein's heartbreak

Throughout 2003, just prior to the capture of Saddam Hussein, and persisting after his capture, WWN ran a series of articles on an alleged romance between him and Osama bin Laden. Year 2003 ( MMIII) was a Common year starting on Wednesday of the Gregorian calendar. Saddam Hussein Abd al-Majid al-Tikriti ( Arabic: ar صدام حسين عبد المجيد التكريتي --> April 28 1937 &ndash December 30 Osama bin Laden, with some spelling variations is the name used in English to refer to (أسامة بن محمد بن عوض بن لادن born 10 March The setup of the plot alleged Saddam Hussein once starred in gay porn films. Saddam Hussein Abd al-Majid al-Tikriti ( Arabic: ar صدام حسين عبد المجيد التكريتي --> April 28 1937 &ndash December 30 In the English language, gay is an Adjective that in modern usage refers to Homosexuality. Pornography or porn is the explicit depiction of Sexual subject matter with the sole intention of sexually exciting the viewer

The "couple" apparently had a steamy, sensual affair, before a wedding was performed, with Hussein as the bride and bin Laden as the groom. Later, they traveled the globe, ending up in France. This article is about the country For a topic outline on this subject see List of basic France topics. They adopted a shaved ape baby (Robert) that posed as a human child. After an argument, Hussein left for Iraq to be comforted in his home town of Tikrit by family and friends, and hid in the spider hole until Bat Boy discovered him. For a topic outline on this subject see List of basic Iraq topics. Tikrit (تكريت Tikrīt also transliterated as Takrit or Tekrit) is a town in Iraq, located

Saddam's Nuclear Submarine

In 2002 WWN reported that Saddam Hussein was hiding in his Nuclear Submarine, called the "Saddam-tilus", in Lake Michigan. In this Submarine he had a theme park and half the Iraqi military. It was also reported that he was planning to launch his nuclear missiles at New York and Los Angeles saving Washington D. C. for his new capital, where he would demolish the White House and build a new palace made of the ruins of the White House. Also he planned to carve a statue of himself out of the Washington Monument. The article went on to further describe how he got the submarine into Lake Michigan. He used the help of bin Laden's "alien allies".

The presidency

WWN is often the home to humorous political satire regarding current and past Presidential Administrations. The magazine scored an important beat when it disclosed that the founding fathers were all gay and that George Washington and Abraham Lincoln were actually women. In the English language, gay is an Adjective that in modern usage refers to Homosexuality. George Washington (February 22 1732 December 14 1799 served as the first President of the United States of America (1789&ndash1797 and led the Abraham Lincoln, according to the paper, was mentally insane and his ghost has also been spotted in the White House giving President George W. Bush advice on the War in Iraq. Abraham Lincoln (February 12 1809 &ndash April 15 1865 the sixteenth President of the United States, successfully led his country through its greatest internal See also Executive Office of the President of the United States The White House, formerly known as the Executive Mansion, is the Official residence George Walker Bush ( born July 6 1946 is the forty-third and current President of the United States. Stories regarding President George W. Bush usually capitalizes on the public's perception that he lacks intelligence. A Bushism is any of a number of peculiar Words Phrases Pronunciations Malapropisms semantic or linguistic errors and gaffes that have occurred The paper has chronicled his plans to run for pope, his love affair with Janet Reno and his intention to nominate Yoda as Secretary of Defense. Janet Reno (born July 21, 1938) was the Attorney General of the United States ( 1993 &ndash 2001) Yoda is a Fictional character from the Star Wars universe, who appears in all of the franchise 's films except for Star Wars The paper also reported his secret plans to invade the moon (which may possibly be ready to explode and destroy Earth) and mine it for the rich oil reserves discovered underneath. The June 21, 2004 issue confirmed that Vice President Dick Cheney is actually a Robot, and that his frequent trips to the hospital are actually to allow him to get his circuits rewired. Events 524 - Godomar, King of the Burgundians defeats the Franks at the Battle of Vézeronce. "MMIV" redirects here For the Modest Mouse album see " Baron von Bullshit Rides Again " Richard Bruce "Dick" Cheney (born January 30 1941 is the forty-sixth and current Vice President of the United States. A robot is a mechanical or Virtual Artificial agent In practice it is usually an electro-mechanical system which by its appearance or movements

Aliens

Aliens are another subject frequently tackled by WWN.

Weekly World News blamed these creatures for holes in the ozone. A Roswell crash survivor, "Altair Bob", made contact with "WWN" via telepathic e-mail. Several factions of extraterrestrials have been using the moon to dump garbage. Martians have been monitoring the Mid-East crisis. Warrior aliens have been resurrecting the dead, fighting Big Foot and training in a mock US town hidden in Antarctica. San Franciscans have opened their hearts to immigrants from Mercury.

One such alien who made several appearances in WWN named P'Lod, has been known to fraternize with known women of politics. P'lod is according to the American Supermarket tabloid the Weekly World News, an extraterrestrial who actively seeks to advise U It was reported that he and Hillary Rodham Clinton once had a close relationship, which ended up in a brawl between him and Bill Clinton who went on a jealous rage. Hillary Diane Rodham Clinton (born October 26 1947 is the junior United States Senator from William Jefferson "Bill" Clinton (born William Jefferson Blythe III, August 19 1946 served as the forty-second President of the United States After P'Lodd left Hillary, he expressed a lot of interest for Condoleezza Rice. Condoleezza Rice (born November 14 1954 is the 66th United States

In the June 7, 1994 edition, WWN reported that 12 U. S. Senators were aliens from other planets. The piece quoted several Senators or their spokespersons humorously "confirming" the story. The Associated Press ran a follow-up piece which confirmed the tongue-in-cheek participation of Senate offices in the story. WWN quoted Senator Phil Gramm (R-TX) as saying he was "amazed it took you this long to find out. William Philip Gramm (born July 8 1942, in Fort Benning, Georgia, USA is an American politician who served as a Democratic " Senator Alan Simpson's (R-WY) then-spokesman Charles Pelkey told the AP: "We've got only one thing to say: Klaatu barada nikto. Alan Simpson may refer to Alan John Simpson (born 1948 British politician Alan K " Klaatu barada nikto " originates from the Cold War -era Science fiction film The Day the Earth Stood Still ( 1951) "[14]

Cryptids

Cryptids and half-animal half-Human hybrids are frequently the topic of many issues of Weekly World News. Cryptozoology (from Greek κρυπτός kruptos, "hidden" + Zoology; literally "study of hidden animals" is the study of and search Creatures such as Bigfoot, Merpeople, Real-life Catwomen, Half-Alligator Half-Humans, Frog Babies, Kangaroo Women, and many other creatures have swept the world by storm on various covers (Abominable Beachman strikes terror in Hawaii!)

Merfolk

A photograph of the mermaid in the Weekly World News "captured" on April 17th, 2004
A photograph of the mermaid in the Weekly World News "captured" on April 17th, 2004

The existence of merfolk is also frequently reported in the pages of the Weekly World News. for differences between alligators and crocodiles please see Crocodilia An Alligator is a Crocodilian in the Genus

The most detailed account from the Weekly World News, recorded a mermaid being caught in a fishing net off of the coast of Florida on April 17, 2004. In Accountancy, an account is a label used for recording and reporting a Quantity of almost anything Florida ( is a state located in the southeastern region of the United States, bordering Alabama to the northwest and Georgia to the Events 69 - After the First Battle of Bedriacum, Vitellius becomes Roman Emperor. "MMIV" redirects here For the Modest Mouse album see " Baron von Bullshit Rides Again " She was at least half-human, very sociable, and extremely intelligent. The mermaid measured five feet from the tip of her upturned nose to the end of her spiny, translucent tail. Experts which talked with WWN reporters say she was able to talk in a sophisticated "three dimensional language" that depends heavily on noises that could possibly be connected to the "click languages" prevalent in parts of Africa and on hand movements that look like sign language instructed to deaf people around the globe. A language is a dynamic set of visual auditory or tactile Symbols of Communication and the elements used to manipulate them A sign language (also signed language) is a Language which instead of acoustically conveyed Sound patterns uses visually transmitted sign patterns A linguist who had spent several hours with the mermaid at an undisclosed marine study facility in Florida declared that once they are able to establish communication, everything known about human evolution, the specialness of human intelligence, everything thought about fish - "It's all going out the door". Linguistics is the scientific study of Language, encompassing a number of sub-fields Communication is the process of conveying information from a sender to a receiver with the use of a medium in which the communicated information is understood the same way eVolution is the third Album by eLDee, it was due to be released in 2008 Fish are aquatic Vertebrate animals that are typically ectothermic (previously Cold-blooded) covered with scales, and equipped with two Four government agencies (at least) were reported as if involved in the care and study of the mermaid, including the United States Environmental Protection Agency, the Department of the Interior; the U.S. Fish and Wildlife Service and the National Institutes of Health. The United States Department of the Interior ( DOI) is a Cabinet department of the United States government that manages and conserves most federally "NIH" redirects here For other meanings of NIH see NIH (disambiguation. An unexpected discovery, the only definite goals at the point of her capture were:

June 17, 2003 issue of the Weekly World News
June 17, 2003 issue of the Weekly World News

The location of the research facility where the mermaid was being studied was never released to the public, but some 'sources' have led to an abandoned seafood-processing plant as an assumed location. For the compulsory pre-trial disclosure of documents relevant to a case see Discovery (law Discovery Observations form acts of detecting @@@ main@@@ - title Hierarchy@@@ keywords structure; sociology; information@@@ review@@@ - Events 1462 - Vlad III the Impaler attempts to assassinate Mehmed II ( The Night Attack) forcing him to retreat Year 2003 ( MMIII) was a Common year starting on Wednesday of the Gregorian calendar. Research is defined as Human activity based on Intellectual application in the investigation of Matter. Public is of or pertaining to the people relating to or affecting a nation state or community opposed to private; as the public treasury a road or lake DNA testing taking shortly after her capture proved that the mermaid's genes are split between both humans and fish; specifically, Homo Sapiens and a sea bass species that has been extinct for over forty thousand years. Deoxyribonucleic acid ( DNA) is a Nucleic acid that contains the genetic instructions used in the development and functioning of all known History See also History of genetics The existence of genes was first suggested by Gregor Mendel (1822-1884 who in the 1860s studied inheritance Human beings, humans or man (Origin 1590–1600 L homō man OL hemō the earthly one (see Humus Sea bass refers to many fish species of various families including Black sea bass ( Centropristis striata, in the family Serranidae) A year (from Old English gēr) is the time between two recurrences of an event related to the Orbit of the Earth around the Sun The pictures confirm the fishermen's verbal description — "Up top, the mermaid has human breasts and arms, a pretty face and long, dark brown hair. An image (from Latin imago) or picture is an artifact usually two-dimensional that has a similar appearance to some subject &mdashusually The breast is the upper Ventral region of an animal’s Torso, particularly that of Mammals including Human beings. In Anatomy, an arm is one of the Upper limbs of an animal The term arm can also be used for analogous structures such as one of the paired upper limbs The term face refers to the central sense organ complex for those animals that have one normally on the ventral surface of the head and can depending on the definition Hair is a keratinised protein filament that grows through the epidermis from follicles deep within the Dermis. Down below, she looks like any other fish, with silvery-blue scales, a sleek, tapered body and broad, powerful fins". In most biological nomenclature a scale ( Greek lepid, Latin squama) is a small rigid plate that grows out of an Animal With regard to living things, a body is the integral physical material of an individual fin is a surface used to produce lift and Thrust or to steer while traveling in Water, air or other Fluid media U. S. Customs agents labeled the creature "an exotic fish not cleared for importation into the United States". The United States of America —commonly referred to as the Within hours of the exotic find, she was airlifted to the unknown marine research facility where the government scientists are said to be giving a complete medical check-up to see how closely connected to man is to the bizarre creature. A scientist, in the broadest sense refers to any person that engages in a systematic activity to acquire Knowledge or an individual that engages in such practices A man is a Male Human. The term man (irregular plural One expert was quoted thusly: "If it can be recognized that humans share a substantial amount of genetic coding with the mermaid, the understanding of our origins may change. Paleoanthropology, which combines the disciplines of Paleontology and Physical anthropology, is the study of ancient humans as found in Fossil hominid Instead of looking for missing links between man and monkeys in the jungles of Africa, we'll have to start searching for the missing link between humans and fish, and between humans and merpeople — the mermaids and the mermen. A monkey is any member of either the New World monkeys or Old World monkeys two of the three groupings of Simian Primates the third group being Jungle usually refers to a dense Forest in a hot climate such as a Tropical rainforest. A mermaid is a Mythological aquatic creature that is half human half aquatic creature (e " Since she was so strong, two crewmen had to pin down the mermaid to the deck by putting their knees on her shoulders while a third blew marijuana smoke in her face to sedate her. A deck is a permanent covering over a compartment or a hull of a Ship. In Human anatomy, the shoulder joint comprises the part of the body where the Humerus attaches to the Scapula. Smoke is the collection of airborne solid and liquid Particulates and Gases ref> ''Smoke Production and Properties'' - SFPE Handbook of Fire Protection Engineering She was placed in an aerated tank that is normally used to keep lobsters and bait fish alive, once she calmed down. A tank is a tracked, Armoured fighting vehicle designed for Front-line combat which combines Operational mobility and tactical Clawed lobsters compose a family ( Nephropidae, sometimes also Homaridae) of large marine Crustaceans Lobsters are economically important as Bait is any substance used to attract Prey, eg in a Mousetrap. President George W. Bush took a keen interest in the mermaid and her well-being. George Walker Bush ( born July 6 1946 is the forty-third and current President of the United States. He felt so deeply about the mermaid that he ordered two personal chefs to help with the creature's dietary needs. The dishes which he believed would benefit the half-human, half-fish were "two of his favorite comfort foods — Texas catfish and hush puppies with jalapeño bits. Catfish ( order Siluriformes) are a very diverse group of bony Fish. Hushpuppies or Hush puppies are an American food consisting of small Cornmeal Breads that are Deep fried in a Spherical or Oblong The jalapeño ( Nahuatl: xalapeño ( or /ˌhæləˈpeɪnjoʊ/ Castilian, Mexican) is a medium to large size Chili pepper Details were released claiming the mermaid had a hearty appetite, thoroughly enjoying the food. Food is any substance usually composed primarily of Carbohydrates Fats water and/or Proteins that can be eaten or drunk by an At the paper's demise, it was working on a story that she had engaged in sexual relations with both Bat Boy and Elvis. In latest reports, she seems happy, broods when she's left alone, and perks up when she sees a human.

Similar to their female counterparts, mermen are found within the pages of the Weekly World News. On June 17, 2003, a merman was reported to have been caught in the South Pacific. Events 1462 - Vlad III the Impaler attempts to assassinate Mehmed II ( The Night Attack) forcing him to retreat Year 2003 ( MMIII) was a Common year starting on Wednesday of the Gregorian calendar. The bizarre creature measured 28 inches, significantly shorter than a mermaid caught the following year in a fishing net (which measured five feet from the tip of her upturned nose to the end of her translucent tail). A mermaid is a Mythological aquatic creature that is half human half aquatic creature (e A fishing net or fishnet is a net that is used for Fishing. Fishing nets are Meshes usually formed by Knotting a relatively thin thread Though this most likely points to the fact that they might have been two separate merpeople species. Generally a fact is defined as something that is true something that actually exists or something that can be verified according to an established standard of evaluation In Biology, a species is one of the basic units of Biological classification and a Taxonomic rank. Another contributing factor might have been the different area of the world in which it was caught. Area is a Quantity expressing the two- Dimensional size of a defined part of a Surface, typically a region bounded by a closed Curve. See also: Fiji Mermaid

Freeze-dried baby

A series of several articles dealt with a couple whose doctor told them they could not have more children, and whose only son, Christer, climbed out of his crib one night and drank chemicals under the kitchen sink. A Fiji mermaid (also Feejee mermaid) was a common feature of Sideshows During the Renaissance and the Baroque eras it was a staple of They decided to take his remains to a taxidermist and freeze dry him so he could stand in the corner, his hand grabbing the waistline of his diaper. Freeze drying (also known as lyophilization or cryodesiccation) is a Dehydration process typically used to preserve a perishable material The next story had them going to prison because it is illegal to dispose of a corpse in any manner other than burial or cremation without a statement in writing from the deceased. The parents eventually died in a boating accident. The final story had a billionaire collector of weird things buy Christer's remains in the couple's neighbors' garage sale for ten cents.

Other stories

Popular culture

Website

In October 2006, Weekly World News relaunched its website in color. The site included video reportage and an Interactive Bat Boy Map. Other new features include "Share your Sightings" and categorizing breaking news in "National", "International", and "Intergalactic" news bureaus.

Headlines on the website are refreshed daily. Samples:

See also

References

  1. ^ a b Lori Becker, "Weekly World News tabloid to close up shop", Palm Beach Post, July 24, 2007
  2. ^ Jane Sutton, "Weekly World News to close (aliens not blamed!)", Reuters, July 24, 2007
  3. ^ Bob Greenberger: A Head Spinning Week, blog, posted July 21, 2007
  4. ^ a b c Peter Carlson, "All the News That Seemed Unfit to Print", Washington Post, August 6, 2007
  5. ^ "Former Weekly World News editor Eddie Clontz dead at 56", Associated Press, January 29, 2004
  6. ^ Mark Miller, "Weekly World News meets God!", Los Angeles Times, August 8, 2007
  7. ^ DEVOUT CHRISTIAN ATTACKED -- AND HE'S THE ONE FINED!
  8. ^ HOG-ZILLA! MUTANT 12-FT. PIG KILLED IN GEORGIA
  9. ^ BABY DRAGON IN JAR ROCKS SCIENTIFIC COMMUNITY!
  10. ^ POPE BEATS THE DEVIL—THREE TIMES!
  11. ^ Lang, Derrik J. Bat Boy The Musical is an Off-Broadway and West End musical. The Weekly World News story about a half-boy half- Bat For the vegetable see Onion. The Onion is an American " fake news " organization The Toronto Special is a free city life newsmagazine in Toronto, Canada, that focuses on Canadian celebrity politics products and ideas fashion and . "RelishArticle&c=MGArticle&cid=1128769074592&path=!entertainment!general!&s=1037645508970 Writing for tabloids was out of this world", Winston-Salem Journal, January 5, 2006.  
  12. ^ Gene Weingarten, "Aliens Beam Editor To Tabloid Heaven", Washington Post, January 24, 2004
  13. ^ Gene Weingarten (host), "Funny? You Should Ask", Washington Post, September 10, 2002
  14. ^ "Senators Jokingly Confirm Tabloid Claim They Are Space Aliens", Associated Press, May 25, 1994
  15. ^ [1]

External links

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